


Congratulations! You're in the wrong game.

by AssassinPyro13



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition, Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Comedy, Gets more serious as the story goes on, I hope it helps at least, I wouldn't say no to hints or suggestions though, Influenced by readers, More tags to be added, My try at comedy, OC tries to act like Papyrus, Pairings and instances that don't get too involved in the plot depend on readers, Rating May Change, Self Incert, Self incert as Papyrus, This will help inspire me to finish my other stories since it has an actual plot to go on, but has some serious moments too, no pairings decided
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-20
Updated: 2018-11-02
Packaged: 2019-03-07 04:12:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13426548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AssassinPyro13/pseuds/AssassinPyro13
Summary: “Spirit, why do you cling to that body instead of moving on? You must not linger to life, young one. It would taint you.”At the bald elf's exclamation, I couldn't stop myself from laughing internally while at the same time, I had to fight to keep my persona alive. If I were to play the role I was giving, I couldn't let on that I know anything other than waking up in that tomb. If I slip up, it could ruin everything for this world and the body I am inhabiting. Keeping my mind in check, I kept silent for a moment. No one can know that I know what's going to happen in this game.But why and how did I come to be reborn in DRAGON AGE as PAPYRUS?!Sans, I'm sorry!A story in which a hard working woman who loves both Dragon age and Undertale wake up as a character in the wrong game.





	1. Just the begining

**Author's Note:**

> For some reason, I got inspired at the thought of this story. Of course, I will work on the other stories I have at the same time. But since They’re almost done, I feel like I need a different change of pace to help me get them done. I’ve done something similar in the past and it worked.
> 
> Of course, like the other Undertale stories, this will also be influenced by readers. But a little twist. You send me ideas you wish to see, and I will do what I can to fit them in. If they don’t work, then I can’t put them in but I will try
> 
> Dragon age actually has a goal so I don’t have to continue thinking up ideas. It’s refreshing and a good change. I think this would help me.

You know, when I woke up to get ready for work at five in the morning so that I could get my daily dose of boredom and hot spicy coffee to keep my blood that was mainly converted to java goodness, only to die by choking on a chicken bone at lunch, I would have just stayed in bed and gave the world a big fat bird with a lemon hat for everyone to suck on.

I did not work my butt off for years to get where I am to die in such a ridiculous way. However, That's exactly what happened. So instead of me being the one to give everyone a bird with a lemon had, life had ultimately just thrown the bird at me and squeezed lemon juice in my eyes and watched from afar as I rolled on the floor with stinging eyes.

But death wasn't like I imagined it. It wasn't cold like I thought and I never saw a bright light that led me down the halls to Heaven. Instead. I felt myself floating with my mind in a daze while voices murmured around me. Honestly, I don't recommend dying. It's rather boring and would give you nothing but a headache.

Who knew you'd still feel anything after death? I sure didn't. Not like it matters now. So, I was now stuck and left alone to float in a black void for all of eternity. Fun right? Being an introvert, you would think I was having the time of my life, being comfortable and relaxed in this silence that I found myself in.

But it was so boring!

Shifting so that I was floating on my side, I gave the most pathetic whine I ever thought possible. Poor Ash. The world hates her and loves to fuck with her with the thing she loved the most. Peace and quiet. Although had I been alive, I would have been snuggled under the blankets on my couch with either my laptop in my lap and playing Undertale or on my ps4 playing Dragon age. Wither one worked. I loved them both and they had been gifts on my birthday.

However, since there wasn't much for me to do in there; obviously, I know. So with nothing left to do, I found myself pondering on my-well- Life, and browsed through my memories of all that had gone wrong while I was growing up. My fondest memories were when I got my pitbull I named Missy. She had the cutest pink nose. Fur white with those light brown spots that took up most of her back, She was a baby and I missed her.

I had gotten her when she was just a puppy. Her mom had been shot by a woman who was afraid that the poor sweet thing would attack her. Secretly, I wish the bitch had gotten attacked. Oh wait, no I don't. Pitbulls were the sweetest dogs I knew and with the right training, wouldn't hurt a fly. Except for Missy who accidentally ate said fly when she was gorging on her kibble. Not that she noticed the fly there. But it had been gross. I have nightmares to honor that fly to this day.....

...Or I did before I died.

I wonder who's taking care of her now? Maybe my mom. Mom loved Missy.

_'Does your brain ever stop working?_ a very exasperated voice snapped me out of my thoughts and left me glancing around in wonder, eyes wide in my disbelief.

Cupping my hands to my mouth, I called out “Hello?! Did you die too? How's the party?!”

_”You don't need to yell, mortal! I can hear you!”_ The voice replied, sounding slightly pained and very irritated at my yelling. Giving a coy grin, I waved my arms out, still looking around for a chance that I might get to see the person who was speaking to me.

As if reading my mind, A robed figure with a scythe appeared before me, standing on what appeared to be a shadowy floor below me. Unfortunately for me, the second he arrived, limbo decided to hit the gravity switch and I found myself falling to the “ground” with a painful thump that left me groaning in pain while the death look a like chuckled. Glancing at his touch pad before him, he gave a noise that gave nothing away while his scythe stood beside him on it's own.

Ignoring the pain, I gaped and stood up, feeling my back cry out as I did so. “Oh my god...” Death was standing before me. Or I think it was him. Who else had that kind of fashion choice in this day and age? And with a farmers tool, to boot!

_“He's not here, right now.”_ Death grumbled, still scrolling on his touch pad. _“You should get to meet him if I can just... find....”_ Trailing off, the bringer of death growled from under his hood. _“Blast it, this new technology! Where is your name?!”_

How ironic. It was at this point that I had to bite my tongue to keep from laughing. The grim reaper had centuries to learn technology and he's still having problems? While I should be terrified at being in his presence, I feel like I had enough time to get over the thought of my own demise. So if he was here to move me, then who was I to make a fuss over it. I only hope that it's more fun than here.

Which might not be anytime soon with how long he had been trying to find me in his system. Shifting from one foot to the other, I brought my fist to my face and cleared my throat.

“Do... Uh.. You need help?”

_“No, No! I got this, mortal! You just wait-AH-HA!! Got you... Hmm... This is strange....”_ Pulling out a very ancient looking book from the pockets of his robe, he let it go and it floated before him, opening up in the middle and leaving me gasping in interest.

_“You weren't meant to die today...”_ The figure hummed more to himself, tracing his finger along the page. _“You were supposed to be saved by Samantha Bellows... What happened to her...? Ah, I see. She decided to go shopping today. How quaint.”_

It was almost enough to cry. There was the chance I could survive but the one who was supposed to save me decided to go to hot topic instead? Talk about priorities. Oh well, It's not like the woman knew that she was supposed to save a life that day, so I can't blame her. Besides, the worst is done. There's nothing that could possibly go wrong now. I'm already dead, what more can happen?

_“But what to do with you?”_ His items now put away (While he must have done it while I wasn't paying attention or they literally poofed away, I have no idea). He reached out and grabbed his scythe, hovering toward me with a bony hand rubbing his jaw, stopping in front of me as he thought.

His closeness did allow me to get a better look at his face. Sure, he was nothing but bone, but playing undertale and looking at fanart gave me enough knowledge to spot the differences. My eyes roamed around his skull and I almost lost it.

He looks like the grumpy grand-pappy of Underfell Papyrus! It was funny, somehow! Just thinking of an old Underfell Papyrus with glasses, bent over with squiggly old cartoon arms, depending on a cane to keep him up as he yelled at kids to get off his lawn. No joke, slacks and all!

_“If you're done comparing me to one of your mortal fandoms, I have an idea on what I can do with you.”_ Once more, breaking out of my thoughts at the sound of Death's cold voice, I blinked, startled.

“Was that out loud?” I asked, feeling a blush creep on my face at the notion that I had gotten caught.

Giving a grunt, he let out a dusty breath of air. _”Did you forget I could read your mind, Mortal? I had nothing but heard you for the past five years.”_

Five years? I was in that hellhole for that long? Why?

_”Because I was busy. You can't expect me to get through every single soul in a matter of minutes did you? I have to do you all in order.”_

Right, the mind reading thing that he literally just finished explaining. Alright, dirty thoughts about what he just said at the end, aside, I probably should let him do his job.

But I'll never get to see mom again. Or Missy... Did they move on without me? Did my brother and his wife have the baby yet? What did they name it? Feeling my hands clench, I pressed my teeth together.

“What's going to happen to me?” I ask, not bothering looking up. Somehow, during my time in my head, My feet became more interesting than the being before me.

_”Well, I don't normally do this for mortals, However, your death was pretty.......Unfortunate...”_

Stupid. He was going to say stupid.

Grim gave a sigh. _”I was not going to say that. I was. However, thinking it.”_

There was a snicker that broke through just as I opened my mouth. The voice sounded familiar, too familiar.

**”No kidding!! I mean, who dies on a chicken bone?! A WING bone!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”**

My eyes locked onto the source of the speech. The Scythe's blade blinked with every laugh it made.

The scythe laughed...

The scythe had a voice...

The scythe sounded like-

“WAYNE KNIGHT!! You sound like Wayne Knight!! How, why?!!!” Hands flailing, the scythe stopped laughing at my outburst and went silent while Grim merely rubbed his forehead as if to cure a headache. “Come on, don't go quiet on me!! He had a cool voice!!”

_”This conversation will have to be on hold until next time.”_ Grim spoke up. _”I am behind schedule as it is and I need to get moving on to the next mortal.”_

**“So, temporary body?”**

Grim looked me over then at the watch he had on his wrist before nodding and raising the scythe over my head. I felt my own body freeze and fear finally overtake me at the realization. I was not getting reaped while dead, was I?!

_”Temporary body.”_ Grim agreed, then locked his sockets on my own. _”We will speak again, mortal..._ then just like that, I felt the cool blade just graze my hair and I blacked out.


	2. Chapter 2

Honestly, when I woke up next, I was not expecting to feel my body being stung like MILLIONS OF BEES!!

You know that feeling you get when you've been laying on your side all night and part of your body goes numb. But then you move it so that blood goes rushing through your said numb limb? Yeah, it's that bad. And to have it flood your entire body made it unbearable!

The worst part was that I was currently paralyzed and without sigh. 

But DAYUM DOE IT ITCH!!

Itching and in pain! What a cruel fate the old timer grim and his Wayne Knight wannabe copycat sad excuse for a scythe!

**“I heard that!”**

Dufuq?!

**“Sheesh. Only awake for ten seconds and already you're complaining! And to think we've combined your two favorite things to keep you passive until we find a new body for you.”**

Well that doesn't exactly tell me anything. Especially considering that I can't move or see! How do they expect me to understand?

Also the bees are still stinging my body!!

**“That would be due to you interning a recently deceased body. We couldn't exactly take a body that was still in use so we had to wait until a demon went all genocide. He will be getting that body back when you no longer need it. So forgive it for being in pain after being slaughtered.”**

A recently dead body?! Genocide?!

I don't know whether ti cry or scream. Well, I couldn't do either right now due to being stiff as a corpse. Although, thinking back to what I heard the scythe say, was a bad choice of words.

**“Yeah, no kidding. So, this is where We leave you. Give it an hour or so at most and you should be able to see and move, not to mention those- (snort)- BEES!! AHAHAHAHAH!!! SHOULD BE GONE! AHAHAHAHA~!!!! BEES!!!**

And just like that, he was gone, or rather, I no longer heard his voice in my head. I swear that I could still hear those faint cackling from that scythe, slowly fade in the back of my mind. Why was that so funny to it anyway? Bees were freaking terrifying! Also, an hour?! I'm going to die like this! Who knows what could happen to me in a state like this?

And who's body do I have anyway?! I hope it's not my great uncle Joe. Great Uncle Joe was a dick.

Who said that being brought back to life was supposed to be like this? And how exactly did this poor sob die? Did they know that someone else was going to be using their body?  
Oh god!

Was it consensual?!

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Okay, as I lay there, screaming internally over the fact that I might be violating some random dude's body without his consent, I nearly missed the sound of dirt crunching under the feet of what sounded like a small army......I think. 

When I finally heard them, I silenced the screaming in my head. Unable to do nothing but lay limp. In a way, I wondered if they'd find me and take me back to their camp, or leave me, thinking I was dead for real.

I mean, I was at one point, but not currently.

'What if they were cannibals.' That thought was more inquisitive than concerned like it should have been. I was not looking forward to dying again, slowly and painfully as they would tear my body apart like some angry badgers.

"Ech. Look at this place. You'd think a cave this small wouldn't have this much decay. I mean, look at this poor sob." I felt my leg get gently kicked as if the kicker was afraid that I would crumble at the slightest touch. The only funny part of this was That he sounded like Varric in Dragon age.

HAHA!! Varric.

"He must have been here for a long time. Still think it's worth digging around in here, Inquisitor? There could have been a sickness in here, judging by this corpse."

Ah, so they DID think I was a corpse. I swear, someone owes me fifty bucks for partial guessing right.

"I'm sure. We need the metal more than anyone else here at the moment. There's more Iron and Drakestone here than out there at the moment."

"But this place is uncomfortable. I don't mind the corpses but this guy sticks out like a sore thumb and it's starting to creep me out."

"I'm afraid I must agree with the dwarf on this one, Inquisitor. At least partial." That was a woman's voice. She too sounded familiar! Casandra?! Also- Dwarf???!! Was I right again?! How?! It was just a video game and yet.... Woow.. I think I'm starting to get what the stupid scythe meant. Mentally going silent once more to listen in, I heard someone crouch next to me, their armor making a small metallic sound and soon, found my body being moved by, what I assumed to be the Cassandra sound-alike. "This armor is strange. Unused but well made, at least the top half. This must have been a warrior that foolishly favored protecting his chest rather than his legs."

"Hmm...." Came the voice that had responded to "Varric" and soon, another body, I'm guessing, judging by the sound off foot steps on the dirt below, stopped beside the, Casandra. "It looks ridiculous. Leave it, Casandra. We shouldn't rob the dead."

At this point, I was waiting for that Brother bear moment where someone says "Sometimes, I can still hear his voice!". Don't ask, my mind is wondering again. Get it together Ash!!

"Inquisitor, If I may," Okay, I freaking know that voice, right there!! That was the back stabbing egghead traitor, Solas!! Flipping old man in disguise elf with amazing youth!! "I sense magic coming from it. Very old magic.... If it is alright by you, I would like to take it back to Haven and study it. The runes on the chest plate are unique."

The silence that followed had me worrying for a moment. Considering that I was currently in armor, and assuming that Grim had pulled a dick move and revived me in the dragon age game in a body I wasn't familiar with (which seems to be the case), Then them taking this, said armor was a bad thing. I played the game enough to know that everywhere you went was a death trap and sometimes even armor couldn't save you.

I'd be vulnerable.

But. I. Flipping. Couldn't. MOVE!! Not even my mouth or jaw would move!! I couldn't even produce sound to protest!!

Fun.... Fun times all around. I'm saying that with such heavy sarcasm that you have no idea, bruh! Like seriously. You could squash an elephant flat with the heavy sarcasm I was showing.

It was then that the "Inquisitor" broke the silence, shattering the peace that came with it, all too well. "What kind of magic? Is it dark, Solas?"

"No, Inquisitor. It feels warm and soft. Like a warm blanket. It's job was merely to protect this person like a mother would her newborn baby. It's very strong, very old magic. I do not think it is wise to leave it here in the open."

"Ha!! So this guy was a mama's boy. Go figure." Thank you very much for pointing that out Varric. As if I hadn't realized that myself. Actually, no. If I managed to take the time to focus on my attention on the "feeling" the armor gave off, it felt more like a big brother keeping an eye on his little brother.

"So you're saying that it could be dangerous if placed in the wrong hands." I had forgotten that Casandra was there. Hearing her stand and turn on her feet, I wish I could have released a breath in my relief. It was any wonder on what their expressions were. The atmosphere around everyone had been amused but as soon as Casandra spoke her question, there was a cold dreadful feeling swarming the room as if they all had made a realization.

I pictured that Solas would have a dark, yet sour look on his face.

"Possibly." He spoke. "I've experienced magic like this. It could almost rival the mark on our inquisitor's hand. Giving the right amount of experimentation, It could. maybe, shatter the veil as we speak in the blink of an eye."

Solas, you can stop drooling now. i doubt my armor has that kind of power in it to do THAT much damage, unlike you! Keep your greasy hands away from me.

"......Well.... shit... That is bad..." Varric pipped up, sounding greatly disturbed. The dirt under his feet shifted; he must have turned to face their leader. "Think we should take it with us?"

"Yes... If Solas thinks it could be that much damage, then we don't need that getting into Corypheus' hands. Take it, but be careful of the skeleton. We don't need it to shatter and alert anyone who might come looking for the armor. Let them think the fool died without it." Oh how charming. Thank you for not thinking of my well being, oh great inquisitor.

Hold up.

Hold your flipping diddly dang horses!!

SKELETON?!

I was a skeleton?!

Suddenly what the scythe said, made sense. And apparently, since he was telling the truth, then that meant....

Oh no....

SANS I'M SO SORRY!! I DIDN'T WANT THIS!!

"Yes, Inquisitor." That was Casandra that time, and I could bluntly make out her footsteps as she strode closer to me, bending down and grabbing my chest plate just as the inquisitor spoke up again, moving further into the cave to no doubt collect what they came in here for.

"And I want all of you to be examined by a healer. If the fool did die of disease, I want to make sure that none of us, caught it."

Following his words, there was a chorus of "Yes, Inquisitor." Shared around the room.

\--

Needless to say, that Casandra hadn't exactly been gentle when she was removing my armor. I mean, my head DID fall and land back on the dirt with a sickening crack, causing my mind to black out once more. I defiantly don't recommend going unconscious while your body's in pain. It makes it hurt worse. On the plus side, while the back of my new head was now in agonizing pain, I could see when I woke up next. And if I could see, that meant that I might possibly be able to move. The first thing I tried to do was move my hands, and while I did that, I noted the darkness surrounding me as well as a cool breeze coming into the cave from the direction my feet were angled at.

It had felt so good that my toes curled upon my request. Perfect. Now that I had a sign that I was able to move once more and now officially lacking any pain in my joints, I sat up-

-Only for pain to flair through my head, followed by thick dizziness swarming my body and nausea. No longer shocked by the fact that I was a skeleton; aka, one of the brothers from Undertale, if my guessing was correct (Hey! I died, met the grim reaper, spoke to a talking scythe and came back to life in a game that I loved! I don't think much can shock me anymore), I looked down at my.... ribs?.... and was not disappointed when I saw an upside-down monster soul, glowing weakly, housed behind my rib cage. In a way, I wondered how they hadn't noticed that. But on the other hand, something told me that Grim had a hand in hiding my soul that one time while I was unconscious.

Leaning against the side of the cave, I waited patiently until the dizziness and the nausea had faded, questioning how a skeleton could get queasy in the first place. While I hadn't expected the pain in the back of my head, I hadn't thought that sitting up would make IT START THROBBING.

Hissing, I reached up, touching the back of my head, only to pull my hand away at the pain that seared the area. I had a big crack in my skull. Looking at my hand, I saw a red liquid, which I guess was marrow since skeletons don't have blood. I suppose in a monster way, I was bleeding. Pulling my attention away from my hand as another breeze came from outside the cave, I noticed a chill on my feet and looked down at the said appendages.

Mother flipper- the butts stole my boots!

I know I had them before they raided my body. True, I understand they thought I was dead and took my armor, but did they have to take my boots as well?! Why did they do that?!

 _"Back in the early days, leather was expensive. That's why, in the army, they took the boots off their fallen comrade and reused them."_ I remember my history teacher saying back when I was in high school. Yeeeeaaahhh that was dark. Now I'll need to travel barefoot. But where? If you're not with the inquisition, if my memory of the game serves me right, someone like me would have been slaughtered, enslaved, or worse. If I went to anyone, no doubt that one of those would happen to me. I'm not one of the races in this world.... well, anymore, at least. The only ones who could possibly protect me would be the inquisition unless I decided to stay out in the wild to protect myself.

But I had no idea if I could use magic. I didn't know how even if I could. I would be killed quickly.

Boy, how would I be able to explain that to Grim? Looking my body over, I was quick to spot a very familiar orange scarf that hung limply and messily around my neck and tight blue shorts. Good thing I had black tights under my shorts. Groaning as the marrow began to grow dry and sticky on my hand, I knew I needed to wipe it off on something.

Luckily, I still had some clothes. While, I knew that the scarf was precious for the Papyrus cinnamon roll, I had no clue about the shorts.

Eh, They were getting thrown away the second I found better clothes. Wiping the marrow off on the shorts, I grimaced as some still stuck on my hand and left red stains on it. 

Right, lake it is.... where would there be a lake? It wasn't like I had this map memorized but I should have been able to spot some key marks as I traveled.

My balances was shaky as I stood, thanks to the damage in my skull. However I managed to stand and stumble my way out of the cave, only to land perfectly face down on the ground underneath the night sky, I have no idea. All I know is that, after an hour of stumbling around, leaves you winded and sore, especially if you have a head injury by some careless chick. However, playing the game enough times to be able to remember landmarks on the first map you ever get to explore, really helps out when looking for water, strangely enough.

What they don't tell you is that the hinterlands is really, really, COLD!! Like, If I had certain male privates, I would freeze them off; it was so cold, especially at night. I guess that's what happens when you're on a map that is mainly in the mountain ranges. An surprisingly, there aren't that many enemies as I had thought there to be. I mean, in the game, there was ALWAYS someone or something to fight. But I guess it's not like that in real life. The hinterlands also happens to be a bigger place than what we're shown. Compared to the game, where it takes about five minutes to get from one place to another, took me almost an hour to reach. I guess the game focused more on keeping the player entertained and busy so they wouldn't stop playing.

What bums.

However, I finally did manage to find a lake and I all but collapsed by the shore, dipping my head in it to gulp down the water. While it was nasty, and tasted disgusting along with it, I was thirsty and in a game where it's based around the middle ages, I had very little options...

I need to stop calling this place a game.

Belly full of water (Seriously, I felt like I had a stomach, but I didn't see it. It was so weird!!!), I sat up and dipped my hands in the water to clean them. Pausing only a moment before realizing something.

I didn't have gloves.

"SON OF A MONKEY WRENCH!!!"

While I had Papyrus' voice, it was both highly amusing to hear him shout this, and made my anger die down. So what if they stole my boots AND gloves. I was just mad it took me this long to realize that. Breaking out of my thoughts, I turned my head and came face to face with a big, brown, ANGRY, FREAKING BEAR!!

Crap.

So what do you do when you face a bear? I don't think running is one of those things to do. For example, grizzly bears can run twenty seven miles an hour alone for an hour to fifteen minutes if need be. The average person can run around ten miles for only a few moments. 

Luckily, Papyrus wasn't "average". It was weird to be in this body. Papyrus was obviously built for speed and stamina, and it showed in his body as I ran away screaming with a big ass bear tailing me not too far behind. It was like a slightly superhuman athlete running from a cheetah. Granted, with his body, I should have outran this bear a long time ago. But that wasn't given my injuries or the kind of magic that Papyrus could do. I was tripping clumsily over branches and rocks, dodging trees and boulders like a pro, but that stupid bear was still there.

Eventually, my luck did manage to run out at some point. And it, ironically was at the edge of a cliff near a waterfall when I stopped just in time, only for the bear to collide into me, obviously not expecting its bony pray to suddenly stop, which resulted in both of us to fall off the cliff to the lake below. As I feel, there were large rocks jutting from under the water below me. As I screamed, I hastily covered my eyes with my hands, waiting for impact.

But it never came. The bear had been impaled on the rocks, I, however, was back into the dark plane in my own body, standing before the grim reaper; his arms crossed like a disapproving father and foot tapping in annoyance.

Woops....


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need to make a point saying that the story will slowly get a bit more serious as time goes one. Like it starts to be less of a game to Ash the longer she's there. :3

_"Is this going to be a regular thing for you?"_ Grim questioned, very crossly; insert imaginary anime vain throbbing visual here, as he stared down at me, making me feel very small. Letting go of his magical and smartass scythe of wonder, Wayne Scythe, I have dubbed hum, to float around in humor. Hands now going to his boney hips. _"If I had to revive you every time you killed yourself, then I'd have to do that for every mortal that came around! It's bad for business!"_

"UH! PFFFT!!!" I spat and sputtered, waving my arms in my mock outrage. "YOU try to outrun a bear as a skele-" I stopped there, staring up at Grim's skull from under his hood. Ooooh.... Oh-yeah-oh. Bad decicion on how to arguewith the skeleton of death before me.

Grim was nothing but bones...

**"Well, if you two are going to get into it,"** Grims scythe spoke up, floating between us, long handle bending cartoonishly as it shifted to "look" between us. **"I'm going to catch up on some light reading."** before floating off into a nearby corner of the...... darkness....

I didn't even know darkness HAD corners.

Funny enough, Wayne Scythe had then poofed sunglasses and a floating newspaper into existence where he was along with a reclining chair. So while I was floating in front of Grim, getting scolded like a disobedient child, Wayne Scythe levitated an open newspaper in front of it with sunglasses sitting on it's blade as he chillaxed on a cushy seat.

Life has a funny sense of humor, it seems.

_"Pay attention, child."_ Looking back at Grim from the comfortable scythe, grinned sheepishly and gave a soft chuckle. Woops, apparently he had been talking to me this entire time I was staring at the piece of farm tool over in the corner.

"Sorry..." I apologized weakly, eyes shifting between Grim and the scythe.

The scythe just flipped a page telepathicly!! I am done!! He's mocking me, I swear he is!

Grim had gone silent. Now standing tall, arms crossed in front of him. and successfully reminding me of my mother while he was at it, he hadn't done or said a thing other than stare at me with the most disapproving look he had on his face.

Only knew him for a few hours and I think I'm starting to be able to read him! We must be like, best friends now, right?

Grim wisely ignored my mental jabbering.

_"Now, I'm going to send you back."_ he started, eyeing me sceptically. _"And I want YOU,"_ he emphithised "you" by pointing at me like a mother trying to prove a point.  
I'm pretty sure Grim was a parent at some point with how much he's making me think of a mother. Does all this make him my mother now?

_"To stay ALIVE this time."_ He lowered his finger. _"Your higher being is allowing you to regain your life instead of having you be reborn like all the others, from the graciousness of his heart."_

Then he bent so he was eye level and face to face with me. 

_"So don't blow it."_

If I hadn't been made to feel ashamed about my second death, I would have been really impressed with his skills. He must have aced his acting classes with how dramatic he was.

Hang on, I was going back?

"I thought that was bad for business." I chirped, scratching my head in confusion. Not going to lie, in the mist of all that, my mind may or may not have wondered off at some points during him speaking. The entire time I had been here the second time, when not being distracted by Wayne Scythe, I had been trying to think of where I heard Grim's voice before. It had been so familiar that it was bothering me.

_"Yes,"_ Grim pipped up, standing up again once more and summoning his scythe to his hand again. _"MY business! Being revived ruins my business, reincarnation doesn't. Guess which catagory you fall under."_

I chose not to reply. Instead, I grinned sheepishly, pulling at a stray thread on my shirt.

Then he sighs, slouching a little as if he was as tired as he sounded just then. _"However, your higher being is my BOSS, so what they say, goes. Now." raising the scythe in the air above his head, he peered down at me._

__"Shall we try a round two?"_ _

_And just like before, darkness took over._

_\--_

_And THAT, my friends, is how I woke up back in Papyrus' body,laying in a shallow lake beside a waterfall with the bear I had been running from, being impaled on the sharp rocks. The bear was impaled, not me, I should clarify._

_Also, let me clarify ANOTHER thing. On top of being cold by both the Hinderlands climate AND the lake, Now I was in pain all over again and getting a face full of water when I woke up after being face down in the said evil lake of doom that was slowly being contaminated with bear blood._

_Gross..._

_Good thing that blood hadn't reached me yet. The current was doing a good job at keeping the diseased fluid away from me that my arch enemy was leaking out._

_Sputtering as another splash of water that hit me in the face by the waterfalls influence of the current, I whipped my face, mainly my eye sockets as water seeped from them after my apparent bath, and stood up after all the said water finally fell out of my eye holes. Which, let me tell you, felt like I was peeing out of them and it was VERY uncomfortable to feel._

_But all that wasn't even the best part!! Go on, ask me what the best part was!! I'll wait._

_..._

_..._

_..._

_Guess yet? So, you know in those comedy adult movies where there's a guy with a floppy dangling dingaling between his legs under his pants? You never saw any of those? Well... I had that._

_But it was a FISH!!_

_"NYAAAHHH!!!" Stomping around in the water, I was quick to shove a hand down my pants in an effort to grab at the wriggling fish, and boy, was it a challange. The thing wouldn't stop moving! I didn't even know how it got in there! The shorts were tight for a skeleton of my-er-Papyrus' build and if that wasn't a challange enough, the tights under the shorts were also a struggle to get into when wet._

_The fish must have gotten in through the big gaping hole in my pelvis, GOSH DANGIT!! No way am I shoving my hand in there. If felt....... wrong to do._

_But, I did manage to grab the fish and yank it out. I think it was a salmon, or a bass. I wasn't sure but the feckers mouth was bigger than my hand!_

_With a startled cry, I dropped it back into the river._

_Good Riddece._

_Now fishless and consious, I wipped the fish slime on my dripping shorts and looked around. I don't remember the Hitherlands having this area. There was one similar but it had a vail portal thingie that was spewing demons and lacked pointy rocks to spear a certain enemy of mine._

_But it was quiet save for the sound of rushing water. I suppose I should be figuring out my situation. But not while I'm anckle deep in rancid water with perverted fish and a dead bear. Sloshing tiredly out of the water and onto the bank, I sat down; my shorts making a gross "Squish" noise as I did so._

_Pulling my knees to my chest, I hugged them tightly and stared down at the river, shivering from the tempreture of the lands I was in as well from the cold water. Ironically, the sun didn't do much to warm me._

_So, I was in Dragon Age as a character from Undertale, Yes, that had already been established. And so, assuming I was in Papyrus' body, did that mean....?_

_Looking down at my ribcage, I spotted an upside down monster soul that held a little bit of red in the center. Yep. There it was. Why Determination was in his soul, I had no idea. Maybe it was me?_

_Looking back up, I placed my head on my knees. Maybe I should see if I had magic like he did. Who knows, it might even end up warming me up from the cold. It's also good to know how to defend yourself here. But the question was how? How do I even go about activating Papyrus' magic to even use?_

_"Feel for it..."_

I jumped at hearing the voice that was all but a raspy whisper in my head. 

That wasn't Grim. It... It sounded like... 

"Skeletor? Is that you?" I ask, eye sockets widening at the sky. However the voice never returned. That must have been Papyrus' voice. But that didn't make since. 

There was no logic to that! 

Says the skeleton that was sitting in a land of a video game. 

Snickering, I stand up and turn to focus on a fallen log that rested not too far from a cavern, about ten feet away from me. 

"Alright Papper Daps, Lets see if what you said was really you or my deranged mind." Alright, so he said that I had to feel for IT... Not the clown but, for whatever this "it" was. Alright. I can do this. Closing my sockets, I took a deep breath, hands clenching in fists at my sides before letting the air go, opening my eyes once more shooting my hand out, palm facing the log. 

Nothing happened. 

Of course it didn't. I wasn't even feeling. I kinda was hoping all I had to do was shot out my hand and BOOM! Magic boner-er-BONE! 

Okay, lets try this again. Relaxing my arms at my sides, I closed my eyes once more. 

"Feel...." I breathe, letting my head go empty. "Feel foooor..... what?" 

Wasn't THAT the question of the day. I felt ridiculous just standing there. This place is dangerous and here I am, following some mysterious voice that popped up-VERY CONVENIENTLY, might I add- in my head. Surely, I must be going- 

-THERE IT IS!!!! 

Not bothering my eyes this time, I reached my hand out like I had before. It was like a tingle escaping the palm of my hand at an alarming speed. The feeling was shortly followed by a THUNK, making my eyes shoot open to spot a small bone embedded in the center of the log. 

Left gaping at the small bone, a joyous smile crawled on my face. 

"I did it...." Whispering, I let out a laugh, throwing my arms in the air. "I DID IT!!" 

Only for a bigger bone to shoot out of my hands and into the air as I cheered. 

Woops! 

I need to get that under control before I can even bother looking for the members of the Inquisition. I mean, while I'm here, I might as well be useful, if they could afford to bother talking to me without attacking me. So, to prove my worth, what better way to do that than get a hang on this magic of mine in a magic hating world? 

**gurgle**

Also, some lunch wouldn't hurt. I wonder where the food goes after eating it? Well, best find out. Turing back to the river, I grinned. Practice time!! 


	4. Chapter 4

**FWAPFWUAPFWUAPFWUAPFWAPFWUAPFWUAPFWUAPFWAPFWUAPFWUAPFWUAPFWAPFWUAPFWUAPFWUAPFWAPFWUAPFWUAPFWUAP**

THAT, my friends, was the sound of a fish tail slapping on the skull of the body snatcher, who was currently holding the thing upside-down; the fish having been the size of Ash's new torso-if not a bit larger.

"Will you freaking stop flailing?! I only want to eat you, what's the deal?!"

Ash exclaimed, using what control she had over her new body to cling to life to her caught meal. Unfortunately, the control she had wasn't much in her hungry state and in the end, her bony arms ended up wrapped around the fish; successfully pinning it to her front and face getting slapped with the fat creatures tail.

Turning her head away from the slapping, Ash managed to open the eye socket farthest from her prey, starting to feel the sting of scales against her skull that, oddly enough, sounded like flesh smacking flesh.

"PFFFT PFFT!!! You're scales are getting in my mouth!! Sthap it!!!" Holding her catch tighter, Ash didn't have time to react as a strong current flew under and around her feet, shoving a bunch of rocks and other small fish past. That, and fighting against a fish that was very much against getting eaten ended in what she would later call, a tragic comedic turn of events. Being pushed forward, Ash' sockets grew wide in alarm at the movement, thanks to the current under her feet. Tightening her hold on the fish in alarm, the slippery stinker popped out of her arms and into the air like a bar of wet soap.

Now resorting to flailing, arms out wide and bend so that she was sure to fall in the lake; all it took was for that fish to bend in the air and smack her pelvis before landing in it's watery home, to force ash face forward.

**SPLASH!!!**

Behind in the air and out of the water while her top half was submerged, she gave an agonized gurgle, watching the little fishies swim by in their desperate fight against the current that had caused her to lose her dinner.

_'They're laughing at me!!! Those goober nuggets!! I shall munch them!!'_ Pausing in her thoughts about how pac-man would be proud, Ash was quick to push herself out of the cold water until she was on all fours, once more coughing the remaining liquid and debris from her nonexistent lungs. It was cold just as she remembered, and with how dark it was starting to get dark, the chill in the air had dropped to a freezing. _'C-c-cold!!!_

Finishing her hacking, the girl-turned-skeleton monster looked up just in time to see her fish swim away into the sunset and away from her with not so much as a "how do you do". Stumbling to her feet, now dripping wet as her shorts clung to her body. Having gotten rid of her tights a long time ago, Ash regretted not keeping them.

"I hate fish anyway." She muttered to herself, dejected as she trudged her way back to shore, holding herself from the cold, wishing she had some form of fire magic or at least a coat. Imagine if she froze to death. Oh boy. That would be fun. Free skeleton Popsicles anyone? It's the perfect Halloween treat!

Grim would be please. After all, he was so happy with her the last time she died, via bear..... cliff? CLIFF BEAR!! A bear that clings to cliffs!! The thought made her laugh but her joy only lasted a moment before a cold breeze blew by, making her body shake, causing her bones to rattle; WHICH SCARED HER, might I add.

...

...

It caused her to jump a bit.

Expecting her bones to actually respond to the cold, she grabbed her ribs in annoyance, only to instantly let them go when she felt a wave of pleasure run threw her body, blush flooding to her cheeks.

WHUAT?!

Frowning, Ash took a few deep breaths before lowering her hand to touch just one rib and instantly feeling a feeling around her pelvis.

No,

Nonononononononono! She was not doing this!!

Going back to holding herself once more, she shivered as the wind picked up and started to leave the river. Any discoveries like this would have to wait until later. It was embarrassing enough to find out that ribs were..... SNRK!! WERE A RIB TICKLING GOOD TIME!

Ash didn't need Grim to be even angrier at her. At least not if she could help it.

She had to at least TRY to survive.

Wet and cold, Ash trailed in the forest, mentally angry at her fishy rival as he bones rattled every time she so much as gave a small shiver. It didn't help that the sun was basically GONE AT THIS POINT!!

"OH COME ON!!!" She cried out to the sky, trowing her arms out to her sides, smacking one of her hands on the trunk of a nearby tree. "OW!"

Holding her injured hand close, she glared at where she assumed the offending tree to be, rubbing the soreness on her bones. Once the soreness had faded, Ash reached out with her hand, effectively finding the trunk a bit closer than she was expecting. Fingers digging into the bark, she took hold and ripped the bark off. "HA!! Take that, tree!! Not so funny NOW is it?!"

Fist full of bark, she mocked the tree, cackling as she proceeded to pull as much of the bark as she could in her craze for revenge. By the time her temper had cooled, Ash had a nice little pile of bark and a naked tree in front of her. Panting, it didn't take long before realizing what she had done and smacked her face in despair.

"What am I doing?" She moaned, dropping her hand, waving it in the direction of the tree. "I'm mocking and tormenting a tree. Truely I have lost my mind."

Allowing her arm to fall to her side, Ash knelt to the bark, picking a small piece up and twisting it in her fingers, using it's texture to bring her back to reality. Slamming the piece back with the others, she got to her feet and glared at the sky, waving her hands out once more.

"A LITTLE HELP WOULD BE NICE, GRIM!!!" She cried out, turning to gaze around the darkness of the forest. "Or do you just like seeing my pretty face in your void!! I'll move in, I swear I will!! I won't get a job or go to collage and you will have to support me all my undying days!!"

Breathless from her yelling, Ash leaned against the now barkless tree to catch her breath and by some miracle, there was the faint light of a dying fire, a good distance away with formless people around it. It was almost as if Grim didn't enjoy the though of her self adopting herself into his care as his unwanted child.

Tapping her jaw with a bony finger, she hummed in thought. If she remembered the game right, the people could either be friendly or not. Either way, they'd be dangerous. I mean, She wasn't expecting to wake up from death as Papyrus. She could only imagine their reactions to seeing a seven foot-maybe six foot, tall skeleton casually walking up to them and asking for food and warmth.

Come to think of it, how can she eat anyway. Ah, she'll figure that out later. But this had to be done carefully and slowly, along with a well thought out and brilliant plan of deviance and diversion!

\---

"Ach!" Varric cried, reaching down to pick up from what had just hit him on the head, catching Casandra and Solas' eyes with his action.

Quirking a brow from where he was, setting the wards, Solas was the first to call out to him. "Varric, are you alright?"

The dwarf in question sat back on his log by the fire, rubbing his head from where he had been hit, lifting up to show a rock. "Fine. Just became target practice for something lobbing rocks."

"Could have been a raven." Cassandra spoke up from the pot of stew she was stirring. "Judging Liliana's ravens tend to do that to ward away danger."

"Not from this angle seeker. This came from behind me, not above me." His words catching everyone's attention, everyone went on alert, eyes scanning the darkness for any sign of movement, however they kept still, waiting to strike at any moment.

Unfortunately, the inquisitor was sound asleep as this was going on, unaware of the possible danger that was within their midst.

It felt like minutes that they were like that. However, despite the rock, nothing else seemed to happen;

That was, until a voice broke out from the darkness.

"Oh shi-Um... Shoot... Sorry!! I wasn't intending to hit anyone! I just needed to get your attention!" The voice was defiantly male. Young, if Varric was any judge, with a high pitch to it. Everyone clambering to their feet, the seeker was the first to pull out her sword.

"Show yourself!" She demanded, shield raised for any form of attack. Solas, standing not too far away, stood stock still; emotionless as he gazed in the direction of the voice, hand behind his back and holding onto his staff should he need it. Varric, meanwhile, hadn't even raised to pull Bianca from her resting place on his back. Having no love for fighting, the kid seemed to want to talk more than fight. And if he could debate rather than rumble, he was more than willing.

"That-That." The voice cleared his throat after the voice crack they had witnessed. "That would be a very bad idea. Like _uber_ bad bruh."

While the choice in wording had Varric and Solas raising a brow, Cassandra stood firm, never wavering from her stance.

"I believe staying hidden in the darkness is the bad idea." She voiced darkly, eyes steeling stronger than before. "It would be wise of you to show yourself before I shove my blade through your chest."

_"So cool!"_ Was faintly heard by the dwarf and was followed by more clearing of the throat. "N-no! I'm pretty sure I'd get a sword in my chest if I were to show myself like you want. And I don't feel like dying...." _"again"_ was the ending word that he felt lingered unsaid, ominously.

"What if we were to assure you," Solas spoke to the boy for the first time, curiosity shining through his emotionless persona for a moment as he stepped to Cassandras side, placing a hand on her own that clutched the sword. " That no harm were to come to you?"

"Well that would be FANTASTIC!" The sudden loudness had them all wincing at the volume. "It would be much better compared to the pointyness and sharpness!"

A look between Solas and Casandra passed the note of suspicion and curiosity; turning to the dwarf, sharing the unspoken message to him, earning a nod from the rogue. Facing the direction the voice had come from, the seeker cautiously seethed her sword, hand lingering on the handle. Giving a pleased nod as he removed his own hand from his staff.

"There. You will not be harmed." Solas spoke in the most soothing tone he could, guiding a hand to a log nearby for the kid to sit. "Perhaps you should show yourself now? I'm sure you must be cold."

"Oh yes..." The voice moaned sadly. "And very much hungry. You have food I could have?"

"Quite. We have just started making it."

"Oh good. Now.. Don't be alarmed. I won't hurt you...... and I'm totally not a demon! Don't attack..."

At this, all three of them tensed. "Why do you say....." Solas' sentence died the second the figure stepped into the light.

"Woah!" Clambering to his feet, Varric scrambled away from the beast that came into view. Out of everything, he wasn't expecting THIS. "It's.... Seeker... It's the skeleton! The one from the cave."

"I.... I see that, Varric...." Cassandra wasn't sure what to think. Staring down the skeleton from the first few days of being in this wretched forest. What was this thing? It claimed to not be a demon, so what was it? The walking dead?

Solas, while alarmed at the sight, was full of concern and curiosity as he approached the skeleton.

\--

Well, out of everything, Ash could happily say that she didn't think that anything like this would happen.

“Spirit, why do you cling to that body instead of moving on? You must not linger to life, young one. It would taint you.”

At the bald elf's exclamation, I couldn't stop myself from laughing internally while at the same time, I had to fight to keep my persona alive. If I were to play the role I was giving, I couldn't let on that I know anything other than waking up in that tomb. If I slip up, it could ruin everything for this world and the body I am inhabiting. Keeping my mind in check, I kept silent for a moment. No one can know that I know what's going to happen in this game.

So while I was basically shaking in both rage and hunger, I placed on that typical Papyrus smile and laughed.

"Nyeheheh!!" I laughed, finding this to be a lot easier than I ever expected to be. But then again, I had only started. "I am no spirit, silly hu-er..." I looked Solas over, blushing. "Elf. Silly elfman!"

"Oh, excuse us. We must have mistaken you for another moving skeleton." Varric appeared to joke, still moving around in discomfort at my mere presence, earning a look from his comrades. Boy, wouldn't he be surprised. All I needed was my Sans sidekick and he'd probably have a field day. Naturally, I had to play the part and started laughing again.

"Oh, of that I have no doubt. Sadly, my brother is much shorter and impossible to mistake for me. As you can see, he is no where near as cool as me and is much more lazy!"

This time the poor storyteller actually paled. I wanted to cry. Meh babeh!

"Brother?" This time, Casandra was the one who spoke up. While she too was uncomfortable at seeing me, I could see something in her eyes stirring. "There are more of.... whatever you are?"

"Of course!" I chirped, smiling happily. "He helped me make my armor."

"You made that?" Solas gained my attention again, stepping closer to me, looking intrigued. "That is a complicated form of magic, spirit."

"I'm a monster." I Corrected gently, ignoring the comment of "apparently" somewhere in the small group. "And that's all Monsters are made of."

"Of course." Varric sighed, exasperated and closed his eyes as he released the air he had been holding within himself. "What else could you be made of?"

"Hope?"

"That was rhetorical, Bones."

It was then that I almost squealed. I HAD A NICKNAME!!! TAKE THAT!!!

"Someone mind explaining why I wake up to all of you TALKING TO A SKELETON?!!!"

Oh dear, the inquisitor woke up.


End file.
